I put your pillow in the closet
today

The one you used
sometimes

It held your scent
for a long time
and even after that
I could always imagine it
until today

ex pillow sniffer

Paolo Cohuelo

"Life is too short - or too long - to allow myself the luxury of living it badly." ( Why is this so easy to forget)

all or nothing at all. . . . .

to love much is to risk much, and maybe to be hurt much, but I don't care to learn how to dole love out. It's always been all or nothing with me. " I know not what plans God may have for you. You are here now, and I am blessed. If The One sees fit to move you along, I pray I may be a light unto your path, and not a stumbling block. and I will offer praise for every single moment that was us. and on the far morn, when you hold your warm cup, and delight in that first light chill, pray give me a thought..."

bereft

Why is it that I will keep close the pain of knowing you can't love me, rather than have nothing of you at all? Such a tortuous homage'; yet I won't ask God to deliver me. Being relieved of you, I would be in no way spared; I would simply find myself bereft...

truth

God loves us, not for what we have or haven't done or been; He loves us because that's who He is.

sappy

I thought I would miss her all the time




that every little turn of my day would have something

missing



until i realized that she'd been gone a long time already



making a polite effort to try and love me



and suddenly the half-assed reassurances she'd offered

started itching



I try and wash but it's like tree sap



When I figure out what will remove it,

I'll keep a supply of it on hand



for occasions like this.

the piano

I find it easier each day


not to wonder

what you want me to do with the piano.



I put your pillow away in the closet

and have decided to ignore your gardening clothes

outside the back door



I wish your car wasn't such a bright yellow

and that seeing you drive down the road didn't

set me back a day every time



There are moments lately

where I genuinely wish you well and

hope you find peace



But they don't last very long.

the tree

There is a hole in my yard


where a beautiful tree once grew

'til an ill wind tore it up by the root



I've spent much time

at the hole,and lamenting

the fruit that never got to ripen



It is the nature of holes

to slough in over time

leaving only a small

depression

I think I will plant flowers in it.

the artist

Larry Bayard October 20, 2009 at 6:34pm


I am a blank canvas

again, today-

I stare fixedly

at the brush she holds

her palette rife

with pain

blacks and greys of every tint

she covers me with broad strokes-

unfinished

I am stacked with the others

wan dream

I've walked thousands of miles


in my dreams

just to glimpse her

smiling . . .

afraid to say hello

afraid she would see me . . .

so close, I have been so close . . .

her surpise

always wakes me

Baba says:

"May that which I give to you as joy, never be needed for understanding."~~Baba Rhum Rhaizin~~